Recently Cord Moving and Storage celebrated Rich Helton’s 25th Anniversary as a relocation expert making sure those that were moving had the best pricing, the best service and always ensuring that the anxiety level was severely reduced. So after 25 years with Cord Moving we had a cake, everyone wrote a special note about their fondest memories of Rich and Cord Moving’ s President Steve Ryan presented him with a gift and some words that struck home for each of in attendance. So when we came across this Quote it was Rich Helton through and through and was used recently in the Quote of The Day.
“There is no better test of a man’s ultimate chivalry and integrity than how he behaves when he is wrong.”
G.K. Chesterton
Just because you know you’re right it doesn’t mean getting into an actual argument is worth it. Sometimes, it’s best to just let things go something. I wish I had learned many years ago. At the very least, before you set out to prove that you’re right, it’s good to check your own argument. To those ends, Wayne suggests you consider a few points before you even react.
- Don’t get emotionally overwhelmed. When you’re opposed by someone, you have an emotional response. That’s normal, but I want to warn you this morning it’s best to keep yourself calm. I like to tell people to be wary of passing a 5 on a scale of 1-to-10 for a given emotion when engaging in disagreements. Essentially, you don’t want to get into a heated debate, and to do so you can’t react too aggressively but always be honest, fair and professional.
- It’s not always necessary to change someone’s mind. Sometimes it’s just plain not worth it to try and change someone’s mind. Unless an issue is serious, it’s occasionally best to just agree to disagree and move on.
- Some issues are objective and others are subjective. With concrete issues (like the time, or the height of the tallest mountain), it’s very possible you’re right provided you have observable, objective facts. That’s not the case with subjective issues, and it’s a good idea to know the real difference between the two when someone says you’re wrong. We have to remember that opinions are usually based on a set of assumptions that are likely unique to the individual. Your “rightness” (no matter how certain you are of it) may really be nothing more than a reflection of your values rather than a reflection of observable facts.
- Your relationship should dictate how you respond. When a friend or family member says you’re wrong about something you know how to temper your response because you’ve known them for a long time. When it’s a stranger, or worse, a boss or co-worker, it’s important to weigh the usefulness of a response. If your boss is vindictive, it’s likely best to accept their wrongness and move on if you want to keep your job unless their wrongness is a danger to you or your company – of course.
- Make sure you’re really correct. It seems obvious to you that you’re right, but that doesn’t mean you’re not making assumptions. The assumptions that lie at the root of our views will be the weakest points so make sure you know why you made those assumptions too. Whatever you think you’re right about, prove it without making assumptions. Once you’ve decided it’s actually worth reacting when someone says you’re wrong, it’s time to formulate that response in a way that will actually get your point across.
Respond In Ways That Won’t Kill the Conversation Immediately. When someone says you’re wrong, they think they’re right. When you both think you’re right, it’s two egos clashing and that means you want to handle the whole process as carefully as possible. Think about this one as you gaze into the mirror this morning because you will come across a situation today I am sure that will test you and your integrity.
